Kouki thought piece after the shopping trip with Shin

(From Ryukuto Academy)

He gave me a choice, and until then I never really knew how much freely having that choice mattered.

It's not like I haven't chosen things for myself before, Father isn't really that...demanding. And there are some things I've found a way to convince him of, when I knew they were the right course for me. I've always had this ability to know when a decision mattered I guess, and what I needed to choose. It's hard to explain and I've always just called it my sixth sense. But this wasn't my sense initially, and it should have been something inconsequential. Something normal and meant as a tease.

Shin meant it as a tease, though he was also poking at me with that razor insight of his. He knew that all I’ve ever worn are school uniforms and professional clothing. Never once have I bought anything else, ever considered it. Which is why his compliment followed by the tease hit so hard. I had his approval or at least some of it and I didn’t need to make myself into what he wanted to do so. While my plain clothing seemed to offend his sense of fashion, he never pushed his opinion. It was always what did I want to do. And I know he wouldn’t punish me no matter what I picked.

I’ve tried so hard to be polite, be nice, do what I’m told. Be the perfect son, and I’ve never received nearly as much regard as he’s shown me now. Shin...are you what it’s like to be free? I had to choose to follow you, and now I’m wearing beautiful but strange clothing and feeling altogether like someone else. Like a transformation is happening, but so slow I barely notice the effects. And yet I believe these events are supposed to be normal for other people. If that’s true, what has my life been all this time? Was it ever really mine?

Is it too much to hope this is the fairytale I’ve been waiting so long for?